Every family has a style, a story that justifies its existence.
Some families are intellectual. Others are tough, hard-working, or rooted in a specific cluster of beliefs. Every family is a tribe with its own story. Family members are expected to abide by that story. If you want or do something that doesn’t fit in, you may be considered an outcast.
Do you want something in life that your family of origin despises?
I’m into psychology and philosophy but my family of origin considers all of the above psychobabble. They are engineers and mechanics. They’re emotionally walled-off from themselves. My family mocks personal development. I love it. Personal growth is my way of life.
Other families are deeply religious. Sometimes an atheist pops out of them. Other families are racist yet produce social justice warriors. Some are highly educated and end up with a member that shuns academia.
You get it. Sometimes it’s like we’re not cut from the same mold as the people who created us. This situation – though no one’s fault – has consequences for all sides. Shame and self-sabotage are prominent among them.
Lack of commitment.